You might be wondering how someone who is very analytical, structured, and interested in science can be so open to new age ideas. Well, in order to explain that, I have to start at the beginning: my childhood.
I was always very different as a child. Through a lot of research, I have come to learn that I was (am) an empath. That means that I pick up on other peoples’ emotions. For instance, my older sister would go through a break-up and seem pretty calm and strong on the outside, but I would start crying hysterically when I was in the room with her. I was picking up her emotions like a radio.
Even though I loved school and learning and did very well, I would have constant headaches and stomach aches. Now I realize that I was picking up on the anxiety of a classroom full of other kids. These weren’t my emotions or feelings, they were theirs. I just didn’t know or understand that at the time.
Another side-effect of being an empath is picking up on the emotions of ghosts and spirits. I have also come to learn that they know who is able to see/hear/feel them and will seek these individuals out. This is what started happening to me at a very young age.
My mom told me that when I was around 3 years old, I would tell her that Jesus came to me at night and taught me “the truths.” I have no memory of this and am no longer a practicing Catholic, so I don’t really know what to think. All I know is that I don’t lie and never did, so something must have happened for me to say that. She also said I used to tell her that a statue of the Mother Mary would wink at me.
I didn’t really get a good night’s sleep until I was 19. I was petrified of bedtime as a child, even with my nightlight on. I remember seeing human-shaped mists float through my bedroom one after the other, night after night. One night I even heard one speak. I heard a booming voice say “I’m coming down the hall” (my bedroom was at the end of a hallway) and a very large mist floated into my room. After that, I hid under my blanket for the rest of the night.
One time I was playing a handheld baseball game in my room and my mom came to my door. So I put it down and went over to talk to her. When I turned back around, it was upside down with the back and batteries missing. I never found either.
I saw my first fully formed ghost at my dad’s best friend’s place in the woods of upstate New York. I was in the attic with my sister trying to sleep in twin beds, when she left to go to the bathroom. In the moonlight, I saw a man standing at the foot of my bed just staring at me. He was wearing jeans and a flannel shirt. I thought he must be a friend of my dad’s friend who had showed up late so I said “Hello” and he disappeared. Just like that. When I told my sister, she said I imagined it. For years, I doubted what I had seen. Until one day my mom was telling my grandparents that my sister saw a ghost upstate and I said “That wasn’t her; that was me.” And my mom said that it was in fact my sister and when I looked over at my sister, she was sliding under the table to hide from me. She had seen the same ghost but made me think I was crazy for years.
I hated being alone in my parents’ house at night. There was always noises and things falling in other rooms. My dog would continually stare in the same place and bark or cry at nothing. So, one night when I was home alone, I started singing to myself to lift my spirits. When I stopped singing, I heard someone down the hall whistling the end of the song that I had been singing. I ran into the hall and flipped on the light, but there was no one there.