Learning to Love Your Flaws

I have very bad seasonal allergies all year long and have been trying to get rid of them for years through EFT. EFT is a kind of acupressure that you apply while you think about an emotional or physical issue you have, in order to rid yourself of that issue. It is an amazing tool, but works much better and more permanently when you get to the root of an issue instead of just “tapping” on the symptoms. I have tapped on every possible thing I could think of as the emotional cause of my allergies.

One of the causes I have tapped on in the past is how much I hate my nose. It is big and oddly shaped, with a cleft in the middle. In college, I was told by several people that I could probably be a model if it weren’t for my nose. My allergies started for me around puberty. I also had acne at that time, which was mostly centered around my nose. So not only did I have this big ugly nose, but it was covered in zits and was always so runny and stuffed that I couldn’t breathe through it. Talk about hating everything about my nose!

Through EFT, I had come to accept my nose and not feel the hatred I once did for it. My nose is the way it is and there is nothing I can do about it (except plastic surgery, I suppose, but I am not interested in that). But I had a revelation today that accepting your flaws and no longer hating them is not enough. You have to go even further and learn to love your flaws.

That sounds great in theory, but how do you do that? There are two things that really make us unique in this world: our talents and our flaws. Without these things, we would all be the same. They are what make you you. I know that’s still not enough to make you love your flaws, because couldn’t just your talents be what makes you different? The truth is that our flaws are what make us human. They are what make us approachable by others. If we were perfect, we would make other people uncomfortable around us and we would be very lonely. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t work on things in order to maintain your flaws. I am a constant believer in always continuing to learn and grow. But when you take my nose as an example, there is nothing I can do to change it (without resorting to drastic measures), so why not learn to love it?

I thought about what my life might be like if I had a different, more attractive nose. What if I had become a model? What if I became conceited and vain? I might have been a completely different person with a completely different life. I realized that I love myself and my life exactly how they are and would not want them to change. And my nose is a part of me and who I am. It has had an impact on my life from the beginning and helped shape my experiences in this life. I realized that I love my nose because I love myself.

Was this the revelation that will finally help me beat my allergies? Only time will tell. I certainly hope so. But even if it doesn’t, I think I have learned a valuable lesson and will definitely benefit from finding a way to love my entire self, including my flaws.

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